The song for him

半情歌 - 元若藍
Half of a Love Song - Shorty Yuen

Flower accepts withering
Wind accepts searching
There are still some alright injuries in the heart
I accept your decision, Who will hold you tight
What song will you sing to make her happy
I wonder when the sky will turn sunny
Earth never stops for anyone
How happy your are tomorrow has nothing to do with me
Our love is a song half sung
Time changes the habit
Heals the wound
And cancels my qualification to think of you
Your blessing is half sweet, half bitter
Like the cold cocoa in my hand
The most, most regretful is always the unfinished
The song I could only sing half
Whether I'm happy tomorrow only concerns me
Our love is a song half sung
Time changes the habit
Heals the wound
And cancels my qualification to think of you
Your blessing is half sweet, half bitter
Like the cold cocoa in my hand
The most, most regretful is always the unfinished
Other half of the song

Go out with friends

Today really feel bad because of Christin and Michelle case, I admit I angry because they lock their blog. [Lock for what? Make a blog for what? Some more put private hate it.] Sometimes I think Christin started dating Michelle, she changed all of the sudden. Piss me off, I tell them about me and "him" what about them? Always hug here hug there, and didn't even care.

“Hate it when friends do that especially my best pal”

Don't care about them, I also going to change my blog address soon and won't let them find me. Since they are selfish, just now in school Sharon, Monique and me exit school about 10:3o am. Sharon's dad bring us to KFC, we're the first customer. Haha. I ordered porridge, Sharon and Monique ordered Burger. Few minutes later, MC came [AKA MIC+Chirs] then I just play along.

I call "him" but he didn't answer, wanted to asked something. I think his avoiding me T^T

“There's no point of being angry, being happy is more like it”

After one hour, Wendy show up with a boy, his name is Kevin. We ate finish our breakfast, all of us went to a Salon. Wendy introduce me to Kevin, his really open up and solve problems for Wendy even me. He said that he had an experience of relationship for 4 times if I'm not mistaken. Include Wendy too, the advice Kevin gave me it makes me feel much better.

Finish styling their hair we went circles, example: Comic book store, then go to a coffee shop. Sharon was thinking going to Mc' Donald, but we're tired of walking here and there. So we stay at the Coffee Shop and chat with each other.

When I came home I collapse on bed, at 8pm mom bring me see a doctor. Doctor said I'm too tired and maybe stress some issue till my body can't take it. T^T This is really getting bad, why I everytime can get sick want?

Firstly I thought todays sucks, while I met a new friend, Kevin, makes the day happy again. Nice to meet you, hope we know each other better. ^__^

My Childhood first celebrity the King of Pop, MJ

Michael Jackson 1958-2009

Rest in Peace

Michael its too sudden that you leave,

I'm sure every fan of yours are going to miss you dearly,

including me of course.

I knew you since I was young,

my childhood time I was always watching all your videos and listening to every music of yours.

You brighten up my childhood years,

and I really thank you for that.

I bet that you are in "Neverland" now right?!

Your own place with God himself

the Peter Pan that you always wanted to be

Forever young.

I hope you can fly free from your worries,

being joyful and glad,

watching over us from up above.

"I LOVE YOU" ALWAYS

Please don't leave me alone

After he came back,
I've been very happy, we have been chatting with each other.
That is what I want, to communicate with him.

I really wish time would stop and it never ends,
but today,
He's having a great time chatting with his friends,
I felt like I'm invisible he didn't even look at me in the eye.

My heart hurts,

"Why?" I was thinking in my mind,

maybe I'm just a souvenir to him.

I really care about him,
always keep thinking about him everyday, everytime, anywhere.
I always share my feelings with him,
but he didn't really open up to me.

I feel lost in an island far away,

waiting for him to save me,

save me from darkness and bring me to his arms and never let go.

Please don't treat me as a souvenir, I really really badly hurt right.

Is this a dream?

Today in school I'm not really happy, don't know why my eyes keep on closing during class. I really made a fool out of myself sometimes, this morning I met my friends at the same place as they usually wait for me and Sharon. Cause we came not as early as Monique and Christin. Never mind that but I always like to make fun of Michelle and Christin during our conversation, talk about their relationship and so on.

Actually to tell you the truth,

I quite envy them being so close together, How I wish "Someone" will be so close to me too.

Is not like I angry or not just seeing them being so happy and make romantic move and all,

don't know why I feel empty all of the sudden.

Maybe I haven't been a real relationship before so I don't how it feels like,

so I just can watch and observe,

sigh..why I can't have such happiness?

Why I feel so lonely and hate myself?

Christin has been a good friend but sometimes I really see a differences between us.

She is lucky I guess.

"Accept the things To which fate binds you and Love the people with whom fate Brings you together But do so with all your heart. "

Sometimes I think should I really tell them what's going on with me lately?

I usually don't talk about my problems,

I just kept it inside and never to speak to anyone about it.

Monique told me that I've been unhappy, the truth is I been thinking of "Should I trust them? Would they laugh it I told them what's going on? What if they spread out to others?

Maybe I'll ask them tomorrow.

The Happiness Place that made me Smile

One place I truly happy is going to tuition,

when I can meet "Him"

It was raining heavily and I soaking wet when I reach to class,

he was in front of me, when I push the door entrance.

I think he secretly smile at me,

I don't know is it real or is just my imagination.

I have drawn something for him, is a picture of a man and a dog in Anime drawing of cause,

tracing it using a comic book picture and draw it all the way.

I gave it to him after account class was over,the first thing I said:

" Wow you have return?"

then he smiles at me. Been waiting for that smile for so many days to appear.

After that I just put the drawing on the table and said: " This is a drawing that looks like you" he just staring blindly and Psy pull me out to 7-eleven. I hope he liked it though cause I spend one hour to finish the drawing.

Carry on with end of economy class, then I spoke to him. His been friendly and all like the old days, I really wish time could stop and let us keep talking and smile. I really like him, don't know why for some reason.

"Love is an ocean of emotions, entirely surrounded by expenses.

Love is the emblem of eternity, it confounds all notion of time

memory of a beginning, all fear of an end."

Doing this for him and myself

This two days~

I been exercise by using a hula-hoop

yesterday 5o minutes, today 40 minutes

I was hoping that I can loose as much weight as I can

The reason is simple

I want to look good for Him [^w^]

and I want to feel good about myself

The reason that I can do less then 50 minutes today,

because my waist had injured.

I think I stress myself too much yesterday

and today I do another 4o minutes.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

"When you're in love with someone is great,

but it also makes you do stupid things

for your love ones."

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Nevermind that as long as I've do my best,

I'm sure I'll loose more weight!!! ^0^

Today I thought I might see him

he said that he'll be back by Monday

I was thinking today,

I might meet him and smile at him.

But I attended the class late, so I didn't notice

I ask Psy middle of class "has he return??"

Psy said "Yes"

I was happy. Indeed Happy

being my old happy self again

After the class ended, I wanted to greet him

but I don't no where he went to

So Sue Li keep me company

Later I saw him when I'm outside with Sue Li

just right in front of Tuition.

I swear that I've seen him smile at me

I think...

His same smile, same outfit

same personality of making people laugh

Is all the same environment again

Message for him:

" I'm glad I can finally see you again, like the old days...

it brings so much memories about knowing you making jokes at me

Hope you don't stress yourself at work Ok? >>^0^<<

I like you because you made me strong, gave me courage, you're one and only person

I care and love. Please don't stress yourself OK? ^0^"

Next topic:

Next is about Justin cat's Whitey,
Poor Justin he loves his cat very much, Whitey has been with Justin for quite long.

Suddenly loose Whitey, pretty sad myself actually.

when it comes with animals it makes me sad

To be frank I hate cats,

but whitey is ok, his cute and all and had really blue eyes that are cute.

Whitey is the 1st cat I would not be afraid of, he has done its duty and Justin must be really proud of him.

REST IN PEACE WHITEY

Seeing you, is the most happiest moments of my life

Incident:18/6

Last Thursday

the saddest day...

Didn't get to see Him... [Sobs] T^T

I thought he went somewhere to have dinner,

but after one hour,

I still can't seem to see Him either.

Pretty sad actually,

felt weak inside me,

when I see him smile I felt alive,

his smile brighten up my day.

~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@

I felt completely strange

of all days Thursday!?

he didn't show up

Later that night
I decided to send him a text message;

it seems that he went to out station

...nothing is the same without him...

>>>T^T<<<

But..
we still got keep in touch

by MSN

happy... happy.. Happy...

Message to him:

" Being in paradise with your family must be fun,

really hope when you come back your smile is still the same,

must be 100% better OK? >>^0^<< "

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

''Confess something to you''

every time whenever there is happy or sad news

the first person I want to share with is you

I feel happy talking to you

jokes and others

Reality OK!

So take care of yourself

don't make me worried about you OK?

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Master what's wrong with you??

Yesterday taekwondo was ok,
don't no what happend to Mr.Lee,
the training was really clam and relax.
I think is because of the venue,
we use a basketball court in Section 5 school.

The floor really ruff,
I step a few stones and hurt my foot,
Mr.Lee give us 10min to play a game call
"Collecting as much rocks as you can"
wht??

I only pick 5,
and Mr.Lee about 28
Wow, wht the hell?

After class Mr.Lee ended the class early,
about half an hour early,
so Psy and I went to see him after class to teach us the pattens of taekwondo.

Wow you guys should see his movements,
Mr.Lee punch and kicks all deadly.
wonder how he do that?

Anyway Good Luck Psy for your black belt test,
Gambateh^^

Because of them I won't give up on him.

Almost being Emo again~

Because of one foolish reason~

Love♥ ~

I hate myself sometimes

always think to much

that's my weakness

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today at school

my buddies realise that I've been quite lately

their really worried about me.

Actually I was thinking about someone

the one person I'm in love with right now

I worried about him very much

I cared for him too

Is isn't the same I thought

but nothing has change but me

I think to much, really ToO muCh

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Loving someone

sometimes is bitter sometimes is sweet

"The best thing you'll ever learn is just to love,

and be love in return."

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

I being selfish,

I can't believe I even made my close friends worried,

they even worried till they shed their tears.

Eventually I really hide myself in a store room in class

So that no one will find me.

Sorry my friends I really think too much

I promise that I'll never make you guys worried again

logically I thought that love was easy

actually is not at all, I understand complete

After the sadness faded

my friends talked about the love that they experience before

After listening Christin and Michelle's love and Wendy's issue

I felt that I gave up too soon.

"Never tried, you'll never know

if the time has come, you mustn't loose that chance

You must grab it."

" I won't give up on you now,

I will never give up, I want to know you better than anyone else

no matter what happends I will love you forever."

"The happiness I receive from you,

I will never ever forget."

School is reopen

Today at school was damn boring,
I nearly had enough sleep,
wanted to skip school,
but my mum just wouldn't let.

During assembly,
I fell asleep,
the Principal really can talk a of rubbish today
>>>Oh please shut up OK!!<<<

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

After that during class I slept again,

don't no why I pass out so fast I really in a mad mood if I didn't get enough sleep

I just got my exam paper all the marks that really can throw in the dustbin

I almost being EMO

Luckily my buddies are here for me,
cheer me up a bit
I want to say congratz to Michelle and Christin
they're finally being together
Good Luck.

I wonder when is my turn though

Skipped taekwondo

Today was bored,
no tuition also can feel bored,
Just stay home and surf the Internet.
Sigh...

My bro completely skipped taekwondo last night,
is was only me who attended to go.
the class was boring without Mr. Lee and Master Bala,
Seriously!!!

@@@@@@@@@@

Psy also came,
later we plan to ditch off...
We went to NZ restaurant,
we met our history teacher's friend.

After 10.30pm,
we went to Suria,
HE seems busy doing something,
I didn't seen his busy completion for a very long time...

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

I felt that I'm bothering him,
I think I must keep a distance till his ready to talk.
Please take care, don't make me worried about you OK~~

My new watch

Today my mom, bro and me went to KLCC together

I was like "oh my god, why didn't I know this earlier?"

ON the rush to choose an outfit,

I really hate to rush, but I have no choice.

We reach to the LRT at 1pm

after that to KLCC
You won't believe how many people are there

it was WOW.

You know where we went to

the KLCC bookstore...

of all places why bookstore

SIGH...

++++++++++++++++

I waste my time for nothing

sit there like I have nothing better to do

nevermind at else I can spend time with mum

After my bro and mum brought the books they want,

we went straight home cause I'm having tuition at 5pm

We went to JJ to have lunch,

later on, Mum and I went to the watch shop call "PK Time"

because I wanted to buy a branded watch of my own

since my bro have one.

===================

There are a lot of watches there,

SEIKO, CK, B.U.M, G-Shock, Swatch and etc..

You wouldn't believe how much is SEIKO's watch all damn expensive.

Scratch that brand,

I went to see B.U.M watch,

there are nice and is totally worth buying.

I got my eyes on one watch,

is PINK and is stylish

LOVE IT..

Mum agree to buy for me

>>>>Aww Mum love ya<<<<

So she pay for it

I wanted to pay half but she insisted

"What you think, isn't it nice??>>>hehe>>>

Oh my is 11:11pm
at this time I'm ♥_ missing someone_ ♥ again

Everything is fine between us

hope it will last forever

What's wrong with me??

This days I hardly eat,
just ate a little bit of rice and some vegetables,
if I ate too much I will vomit.

My dad's mood this days are really bad,
don't know what happened
sigh...when he buy us lunch and dinner
I'm super scared, cause I really ate really little this days.

Example: 2 big packet of rice, 2 fish, 2 big chicken liver and some dumplings.

I just took 5 spoons of rice with a plate, and half a liver and little bit of fish,
and I can felt that I'm really can't ate anymore,
but been scolded by dad.

What should I do now??

Unhappy..

Sigh..
just recover from fever is been a week,
lucky I'm ok now.

Don't why I feel so unhappy today,
something is missing,
I even don't know why I'm being like this.

Sigh..
talk to me please!!!
I really need you,
I really really do.